Last week, we talked about personal insecurity and how that affects our lesbian relationships. Now we will focus in on how those insecurities come about and what they mean in a relationship.
How Do Insecurities Manifest?
Insecurity can manifest in various ways depending on the severity of the insecurity and one’s natural inclination towards certain actions and emotions. Insecurity can be associated with impolite attitudes, overconfident persons, feeling shy and timid, an aggressive behavior or an isolated nature. Many of the people who seem confident are actually rather insecure. Many people with a bully like persona normally ridicule those who demonstrate more clearly their inner insecurity. Therefore, they use bullying as a way to shadow their insecurities.
It is evident that one’s insecurities can create problems in everyday life but the most severe life activity that insecurity prevents us from is becoming involved in serious relationships. Opening your heart and revealing your inner most feelings and secrets can be quite intimidating. If this trust has been betrayed in the past then great lengths will need to be taken in order to overcome such personal insecurities. These types of insecurities may come from past relationships which were abusive (either physically or mentally) or from childhood memories of one’s parent’s relationship. The good news is that you will be able to identify the situations where you feel personally insecure so that you can begin to overcome this insecurity in order to live a happier and healthier life.
What Does Insecurity Mean in a Lesbian Relationship?
Insecurity in a relationship has disaster written all over it from the beginning. Our personal insecurities about how we look, how we feel, how we dress, how intelligent we are, how much money we have, etc often lead to jealousy. If we see our girlfriend with a women who seems superior in the area where we feel insecure then we instantaneously become jealous. Jealousy which arises from insecurity can manifest in giving this woman the cold shoulder, creating arguments over her with your girlfriend until breaking up because you let your insecurities get the best of you.
It is normal and human to be insecure but it is a problem when your insecurities are compared to the confidence of others. Constant comparing of women will only lead you to become more insecure and behave in an unattractive manner making it impossible for your partner to really get to know you and become part of your life. Normally in the moment where your relationship should go to “the next level” you often find yourself thinking of ways on how to break up with your partner rather than opening yourself up and discussing your insecurities in the attempt to overcome your insecurities.
Tune in next week for the final part of insecurities to learn how to overcome them.
